A friend and I have simultaneously hit a wall of intolerance for our expanding waistlines. We are good enough friends to have compared our belly fat up close and personal and we agree that we are both at a crisis point.
My friend has spent the last few months reveling in her life as a “slug.” She has discovered why people get big and fat – its fun. In her words, “You get to eat whatever you want, you don’t have to exercise, and you don’t feel bad about it. You just do whatever you feel like doing.” She was able to do that until this morning.
I, on the other hand, have been feeling guilty about every carb I eat. To feel better, I eat something sugary. A cookie. A brownie. A handful of Honey-Nut Cheerios. And then another. And another. And then I berate myself for falling off the wagon and allowing my belly to get to this point. And then I have another cookie to feel better – for about 1 minute. And then I want another cookie.
This morning, my friend and I talked at length on our walk about what we have done in the past to get back on track. After going over all of the times we have deprived ourselves of food and restricted treats and, well, been sort of mean to ourselves, we decided to try something new.
We are going to walk every morning.
Yes, it is a small thing. It may not make up for a whole plate of brownies, but it is something. It is something we are giving ourselves – not taking away. We are adding something in. Not taking something out.
One of my favorite authors, Caroline Myss, who wrote, Anatomy of the Spirit (among other things), says that the number one way to build self-esteem is to make a commitment to yourself and keep it. She strongly recommends that you make the commitment something to do with your physical body.
Taking care of ourselves has to do with self-esteem. If I cared for myself more, I would probably eat food that gave me energy, rather than the quick, drug-like hit of sugar. And learn from the inevitable crash that comes with it. My friend and I are still discussing how we lose ourselves and do things that are not in our best interests – like eating cookies. Many cookies. I will share more on this as the conversation unfolds.
For now, my friend and I are trying something new. We are making a commitment to add an early-morning walk to our day. Everyday. Rain or shine. I am putting this out there on my blog (to all 3 of you who read it!) to make myself accountable. Because I want to care for myself.
Do you do anything to care for yourself?