Do You Pack For Your Partner?

milano duffle

A long time ago, I went on a vacation with my husband and discovered, upon arriving at our romantic destination, that he had packed a whole suitcase full of…dirty clothes.

Not “dirty clothes” like an exotic dancer might wear.

Seriously, dirty clothes.

C’mon, say it with me…what the heck was he thinking?

I didn’t pack for him after that, but I know I nagged him and worried a lot about what was packed in his suitcase anytime we went away.

So, I would really like to know what you think…

Do you pack for your partner?

Is it okay to give him a list?

At what point does your “help” become downright emasculating and ruin the vacation anyway?

Here are some great links on this topic to check out!

The best pieces of clothing for men to bring on trips:

Packing lists for men – for a weekend get-away – no matter where you are headed:

The impact of doing too much for him:

Share This:


  1. Steven Elder says:

    OMG, when you wrote “not like an exotic dancer would wear” I literally laughed out loud! I wasn’t even thinking that (which is strange) so it caught me off guard and I loved it! You are hilarious!

    Btw, I hate packing, I’m terrible at it, I don’t have an FME (fragile male ego), so I WANT my wife to pack for me. It seems to me even guys with egos would appreciate help packing 🙂

    1. annie kip says:

      Hi Steve – I am so glad to hear you are FME-free! Your wife is lucky that you can appreciate her help – if she is willing to give it! I like giving my input (I have lots and lots of opinions to share!), but know it is easy to cross over into the CFZ (“control-freak zone”) where things can start to feel not so good. It is great to hear a guys perspective on this – thanks so much for chiming in!!!!

  2. Gina Auger says:

    I make one list similar to what you mentioned. They wouldn’t even think to take dirty clothes, but only because that would actually require them to walk to the laundry room to get them!

    1. annie kip says:

      Very funny!!!

  3. Gina Auger says:

    I give everyone a list. They welcome getting it. I’m thinking years of following a list will enable them to create their own as they are older. Or perhaps they’ll call on me and my lists when going away for spring break with their friends. 🙂

    1. annie kip says:

      Hey Gina! I agree with your thinking – we have to teach our kids to think through what they will need so they can do it on their own when they are older. Do you make individual lists or one list for all to follow? I usually post one list in the hallway that gives a general schedule for the trip and a general list of what will be needed (i.e. 2 shorts, 4 t-shirts, 1 sweatshirt…) and they can make adjustments depending on what they like to wear – and what is clean!!! I always specifically ask them to bring clean clothes!!!

  4. Deb White says:

    I always let Michael pack for himself, come what may … am letting the boys do so now, too (but I check the younger one’s!) … they need to deal with the consequences of not packing well. The end. 🙂

    1. annie kip says:

      Hi Deb! I agree that experience is the best teacher for everyone (I am pretty sure that my (now) ex-husband doesn’t bring dirty clothes on vacation anymore!). I also feel that allowing kids to do as much as they can for themselves is the best way to help them become more responsible. There are so many dimensions to raising our kids – I have one son who is a worrier and I want him to learn that, thinking through what he will need is wise, but even if he doesn’t pack exactly right, he can still have fun on the trip. It is always a balance!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.