Getting Focused

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Whenever I am having a hard time getting my thoughts in order and managing all of the competing priorities running through my head, I know it is time to sit down with pen and paper. Writing in my journal has always been a good way for me to sort things out, but sometimes I just need a great big sheet of blank paper and some colorful markers.

Today, I took my youngest son and his friend to a local fishing spot and sat in the back of my car to do some serious thinking on paper. I had a beautiful view, a bottle of seltzer water, and a bag of licorice. What more could a girl want – other than a soy latte?

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As with my journal, I try to not pre-edit what comes to my mind before I write. This is the best way for me to get all the things running through my head out onto paper, so I can look at what I have to say and sort through to find patterns and clues which will lead to a productive course of action.

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I try to start with the end in mind and think about where I want to be or what I feel I need to be focusing on – for example: work. From there, I write down all of the other things I am spending time on – like searching for a sphere chandelier, planning adventures, doing projects around the house, blogging(!), playing tennis, doing laundry, etc.

My method for dealing with these very important, but not always productive “distractions” is to “routinize” or “neutralize” them.

In the category of “routinize,” I would put tasks like laundry, cooking, food shopping, tennis, and making time to focus on work. For instance, I have a pretty good system for laundry, but depending on the time of year, it needs a little tweaking. I still want to play tennis, but if I can set myself up with regular games, I won’t have to spend so much time responding to emails and making plans to play. Food shopping can be “routinized” as well as “neutralized” by getting back to my weekly Peapod online grocery delivery service. Shopping for food this way is well worth the small delivery fee in exchange for the hours of time it saves me. I can also “routinize” the things I like to do – like blogging and searching for a sphere chandelier. I try to ”routinize” those sorts of things by giving them to myself as a reward in the evening or after doing other, less fun, things.

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I love using markers to make sense of my notes and make my plans. I do love plans.

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In the category of “neutralize” I would put things that can be eliminated altogether or seriously minimized in some way. For instance – stressing out about my garden. I have decided to just stop worrying about it. I am done. The bunnies can have it this year. Also, I usually try to clean my house by myself in the summer (hopefully with the help of a few kids!) but this summer I am working a lot more, so I have decided to keep the cleaning lady coming twice a month. I can also see that my laundry might be “neutralized” if I could do a big purge of kids’ clothes and eliminate extras and things they have outgrown.

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There are always trade-offs. I try to carefully select where spending money will give me the most benefit. Nothing is perfect and my systems are always being refined. I love my big sheets of blank paper where I can unload all of the worries running through my head. There is always a solution if I look hard enough. Seeing everything on paper just makes it easier for me to manage.

How do you get yourself focused?

Oldies But Goodies – Bad Ass Calendaring

I hope to have my computer back tomorrow.  In the meantime, here is a post which bears repeating!

How I become a Google Calendar Rock Star…

I graduated from college and, almost immediately, became a devoted Day-Timer person.  I worked for Nike and Polo Ralph Lauren and thought I was “all that” and then some.  (You know, the way we all do before we figure out that we don’t know anything.)  It was the 80’s and 90′s, so me and my big ole shoulder-pads went to productivity seminars, read the enclosed materials, and mostly sometimes followed the 7 Habits system for managing time.  I loved the leather notebook, the perfect lines, the promise and possibility of a blank page and all of the rules and systems which would make my life, well, perfect.  It all made sense to me!

apparantly, I thought the fashion goal was to look like a football player

This changed when I quit the corporate world and had a baby.  Suddenly, nothing made sense.  My schedule became much more flexible, but then, again, it was more difficult to manage.  Sure, I could stay at the park longer since my little darling seemed content, but I would pay for it later in the form of an over-tired devil child around 5 p.m. I could go to the grocery store any old time, but then again if I didn’t ever get there, we might not have milk for dinner and breakfast. (I have lived through this, actually, and it isn’t the worst thing in the world. We did survive.)

The point is – without a clear schedule imposed by work and a desk, I was less inclined to carry around my big ole Day-Timer just to schedule things that didn’t actually have to get done at any particular time.  Things were a little loose.  Yes, things were beginning to slip.

no actual babies were harmed in the process of taking this photograph

Then I had another child.  And another child.  And somehow, I was surrounded by three sweet, fun kids who were never happy all at the same time.  I was busier than a one-legged man in an ass bottom-kicking contest.

When they got bigger, older, and became more independent things really heated up.  We had to be places at specific times for activities, sports, clubs, lessons, conferences, play dates, parties, performances, etc.  Many times we have had to be three places at once at a specific time!  At the same time, my personal schedule and all the places I needed to be seemed to increase exponentially as well.

Needless to say, I was late a lot, overwhelmed and frustrated.

Then came…Google Calendar!  Don’t get me going at a cocktail party – I will talk about this thing like it is some kind of new religion.  I still love paper and use it to plan and think and make pretty things all the time, but Google Calendar has brought awesome to my scheduling powers like nobody’s business.

TOP 10 REASONS I LOVE Google Calendar

1.  I can see and input events into my Google Calendar on my iPhone!

2.  Multiple calendars can be viewed at once – so I can see conflicts before they happen!

3.  I can customize calendars with pretty colors! – pink for “Annie’s Calendar,” orange for “Kid Activities,” somber blue for “Parenting Schedule,” and hot pink for “Annie’s Crazy Perimenopausal Cycle,” etc.

4.  I can choose to share individual calendars with others (or not share with anyone, as in the case of my “Annie’s Crazy Perimenopausal Cycle”)

5.  My kids can input their activities into the calendar themselves!

6.  Google calendar is stored somewhere in the clouds, so my computer can never lose it!

7.  Inputting is very intuitive, quick and kind of fun!

8. I can view the calendar by month, week, day – or any custom amount of time I want to!

9. Everything is neat and tidy – no crossing out, no smudged pencil, no heavy notebook!

10. Searching for past or future events is really easy!

Oh wait!!! I have more!!!!

11. I feel like an organizational rock star when I sit down to survey the magnificance of my Google Calendar!

12. Google Calendar is a really interesting topic to talk about at cocktail parties!

13. I can make a new calendar for planning anything! – Meals, Projects, Christmas, etc.

14. My proficiency with Google Calendar shows my kids that I am not a complete techno-idiot!

Disclaimer: Sometimes, I am still late. Sometimes, I still forget things. Sometimes, I still burn dinner. This is not Google Calendar’s fault. I am simply doing my part to live up to my “plenty perfect” philosophy and allow all the other moms (who never forget or burn anything!) feel good about themselves.

 

Anyone want a “do-over” right about now?

Just about this time every year, I start thinking about what I want to do differently next year.  Christmas is great and all, but geeeez it can get nuts quickly.  Sometimes, I just need to take a break, step back and reflect on what life would be like if I did only what I really want to do.  A girl can dream, can’t she?  I actually have a notebook with tabs for each month of the year and I have been keeping notes for many years.  It is functional fantasizing.  Sort of like when you are “trying” to have a baby – its fun and all, but it would be more fun if you didn’t have to think about it.  I wish I could just naturally do everything at the right time and everything would work out, but I need a little help getting there.

just the basics – nothin’ fancy
I write down thoughts as they come to me – really basic notes – for instance, ideas for family traditions, or when I notice that I completely missed raspberry-picking season, or when the New Year’s Eve rolls around and I realize I have nothing to wear to a party, or every mid-December when I am ready to send out Christmas cards and I can’t get a decent family picture.  Or, when I realize I have missed my yearly opportunity to “Talk Like A Pirate” all day – that really bums me out.  
 
The notebook can only do so much to keep me on track (because, of course, you have to look at the notebook to remember what to do), but it is helpful and sort of fun to look at the notes and know that I don’t have to actually do it all.  I get to freely choose which items are worth doing, knowing there is always next year.  The notebook never makes me feel guilty.  It is my friend.  Also, when things are written down, I don’t have to wonder whether I have early-onset Alzheimers.
 

September To Do

 

December To Do
 Some months have more notes than others, but I like having a place to keep information which will otherwise seep out of my feeble brain.  The actual notebook is not fancy, the notes are not tidy, some ideas never get done (like “play hooky on first snow day” – what, am I crazy???), I forget things all the time, but my notebook saves my brain a lot of trouble and I think the whole thing is plenty perfect.